A nice step back to think about steps forward.

300
Warner Brothers
Legendary Pictures

Maybe I went in expecting not to be so impressed, since this film targetted practically everyone from 18-35 who had even the smallest taste for history, violence, toned masculine bodies, blood, war and extremely poky nipples. And boy was I sure right. This was aimed for the Tarantino generation, and precise marketing and on-screen decapitations kept the audience's thirst for more bloodshed quenched.

I wasn't that disappointed with the film, which I will cover later. Let me moan about the other cinemagoers that graced the theater with their presence last night. Its getting worse. Not the cinema, well thats for certain. I'm talking about the common shred of respect from one man to another about keeping your piehole shut during the duration. I don't need to be reminded that the Spartan on-screen just died a good death by hearing you saying: "Oh shit, he just got killed." The world is full of enough Captain Obviouses, I don't need one close to me in a movie theater to repeat what my eyes and ears have already taken note of.

And during the more political scenes back at Sparta, these four cumquats decided to chat it all up behind me, and rob me of the subplot the 300 team felt should be in there to balance with all the action and gore. The 300 team filed miserably while the idiots behind me won in their keen methods of verbal distraction. Wankers, the lot of them.


Now, onto the moofie:
It had some vision, I'll give it that. Granted the only real stylized violence I enjoy thoroughly is from Jackie Chan films - and not Rush Hour, but his older stuff like Rumble in the Bronx and First Strike. It had its moments of graphic novel-inspired shots, which were a great reference to a film primarily shot in front of a bluescreen. Stylized violence is still violence, a spear going into a man's chest, then back out is still violent. Everyone knew the digital blood was digital; added in during post-production. But what's going to happen after seeing this film 8 times, at the real sight of blood, will said desensitized person say: "Oh shit, he just got killed."

There was a time when that kind of violence and war was inevitable among great civilizations. And idiots like us in the modern age ought to realize we don't need to be barbarians and kill each other in the name of freedom or 'restoring freedom to those who never had it.' There's a war waging right now, and this film couldn't have been released at more of a perfect time. That is, if you're pro-war, which I certainly am not. Some of the moments hit a little close to home, reminding me of this country's current state of affairs. Sure our might may be as strong as a Spartan Phalanx, but that doesn't mean we need to use it to gain commodities which do not belong to us.

The inspirational quotes in the film, from soldier to soldier, leader to army, etc, were all regurgitated and re-worded from previous dialogue throughout all media and all time. I could only shake my head and yearn for originality.

I was entertained for two hours, simple as that. Not as entertained as I could have been, but it was still worth watching. Never forget the past or else you are destined to relive it. Thats all I gained from this film. A nice step back to think about steps forward.



300 is available to own on DVD starting July 31st, 2007.